People Judging People: Why Can't I be Myself?

Greetings folks, I'd like to ask you to forgive me if you think this piece is lengthy, but I have to get this off my chest because we have a very very longstanding problem in society.  I said with SOCIETY, not with one particular group, class, or race of people.  You see it and you hear it all the time.  What is this problem??  People judging people.  This has got to stop.  I'm a very humble and cordial guy, but because of this problem, I am very particular about who I let into my very close inner circle.  I will not disclose any names or identities, but this problem really struck a nerve in me once I began my business.  For instance, if you take a look at the photos for my clothing line scrolling to your right, you will see a variation of looks and styles.  This is what I love about fashion, fashion is about being Y-O-U and expressing Y-O-U, not somebody E-L-S-E.  There's no right or wrong in fashion and the arts.  I've had several people say to me, "you shouldn't have the girl in your photos with the red hair?" as well as some other things that I won't divulge in because people's ignorance I refuse to dwell on or entertain.  I also know someone that told a woman she should stop meeting men in Wal-mart because that's not a place where you find a quality man.  The analogy used was, "if you want quality fruit, you don't go shopping at Wal-mart, you go shopping at Whole Foods."  Next, there is a group that I was invited to join whose mission is to bring back charm, style, & chivalry (the marks of a gentleman) in men.  Apparently, according to this group, a man's being a gentleman starts with his attire. 

Here is my response to this problem.  Why not have the WOMAN in my photos with the red hair?  Does her red hair make her inhuman?  Or is it that, you're so high-strung on yourself (for whatever reason) that just because you wouldn't wear red hair, it is wrong to wear red hair or whatever other color?  I know why I chose her to be a model/promoter of my clothing brand and that's all that matters.  I chose her because I saw GREATNESS in her.  God blessed her with a GIFT that many of you wish you had, and I immediately recognized it the first time I saw her work.  As for finding a "quality" man in Wal-mart, in retrospect when I thought about this, I'm thinking to myself..."I shop in Wal-mart, so are you saying I'm not a quality man??"  As for this "gentleman" group, one of the points in their mission is, "We will reject the impulse to rock athletic or Hip/Hop gear."  Who in the HELL said, not dressing in athletic or "Hip/Hop" clothing means you're not a gentleman.  Anyone that knows me, knows I am very versatile when it comes to my style.  I can dress up very well and I can dress down very well (one of many gifts God gave me).  Does this mean, I am not a gentleman because of what I have on??  Now, don't get me wrong; I'm not a fan of my pants hanging under my backside and you will never see me dressed that way, but I dress for my mood.  Very humbly speaking, I am a damn great dresser, and I can give you a run for your money in that category AND in any particular style. 

I think its funny (and a disgrace at the same time) of how judgmental people are.  Who the HELL sprinkled magic dust on you and told you the way that you choose to live, dress, act, etc. makes you the "model citizen".  How do you know, the way you live, dress, or whatever else you do is not correct?  It seems as though there are people in the world that are so educated and because they've achieved a FEW things in their life they think they have "arrived".  NO! You haven't "arrived" until you've help others "arrive" with you.  There is a such thing as an 'Educated Fool' you know.  Get off of your high horse and stop staring down your nose at people.  Inspire and encourage someone else to be the best THEM they can be and not the best YOU they can be.  God created us as individuals not copies and your judgmental ways are absolutely blasphemous in my opinion.  People need to learn how to respect the individuality of others and stop trying to make it seem as though conformity is the way to live.  Lets be real, so if this woman with red hair or this guy that isn't "dressed" like a "gentleman" (whatever the hell that means), were to pass out in the middle of the street, you would walk your bourgeois, ostentatious behind right by them??  I know that may seem extreme, but there are people in the world that would do that, and I'm just asking a question.  Some people need to check themselves (White, Black, Hispanic, Asian, Indian, etc.).  If, to each is own (as so many people so loosely use this phrase), then why is your mouth open in utterance of judgment.  Who the HELL died and named you God??  I absolutely love and admire people that don't give a damn what folk think about them. 

We all were wired with GREATNESS in us.  Which is why I believe in my heart that everyone can Achieve GREATNESS (and I will go to my grave helping as many people as possible achieve it).  GREATNESS is not racist.  It is not prejudiced. It is not judgemental, and it does not deal in the act of showing favoritism. GREATNESS is however, a mentality. It is attainable. It is humble. It is giving. GREATNESS is patient, it is kind. GREATNESS does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. GREATNESS is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. GREATNESS does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. GREATNESS always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. GREATNESS never fails. Hence, GREATNESS is 1 Corinthians 13...LOVE.  GREATNESS has no one particular face.

Anybody reading this post and knows me well.  If I have ever at some point in our knowing each other made you feel as though I have judged you for what you choose to do with your life, I am asking you to forgive me.  Seriously, judging folks is not cool. 

I encourage your responses to and sharing of this post with others.

Much love and continued success to everyone,
CJ 'Mr. BCE' Nelldell
Identify Yourself with GREATNESS™
http://www.bceapparel.com/

RECEIVE CASH FROM BCE

BCE is very pleased to have you as a customer partaking in the BCE experience and the Achieve GREATNESS movement.  Our referral program is a way for you to engage others in experiencing the BCE experience as well.  For a one month trial period (now through January 16, 2011), once you become a customer spending a total of at least $49.98 either in one visit or multiple visits to our web store, you become eligible for our referral program. When you (1) REFER 4 NEW PEOPLE/CUSTOMERS TO OUR WEB STORE, (2) THEY MAKE A PURCHASE WITH A SHOPPING CART TOTAL OF AT LEAST $24.99, AND (3) DURING CHECKOUT WRITE YOUR NAME IN THE BOX THAT READS "HOW DID YOU HEAR ABOUT US", WE WILL SEND YOU $10.00 CASH! You can spend this cash however you choose.


HOW DO YOU RECEIVE THE CASH?: You can opt to have the cash sent to you via Paypal or check. Once we see your name 4 times, an email will be sent informing you of your $10.00 earnings and requesting how you prefer to receive your cash. Limit one (1) $10.00 award per customer. BCE reserves the right to amend and/or discontinue this program as we see fit without notice.
 
BCE...a Fashion Line for the Bold, Confident, & Excellent
Identify Yourself with GREATNESS™
http://www.bceapparel.com/

BCE Makes Nationwide Push to Support Music Education

Believe it or not, music happens to be one of the most important parts of our lives and cultures, but its importance in education is very often underestimated by many.  Those who choose not to take the time to understand it would characterize it as, an area of education that is "easy" or a "recreational escape" from more liberal art forms (i.e. math, science, literature, etc.) as well as, professional, vocational, or technical curricula.  These characteristics are believed so much so that when cuts are made within the school boards, the Board of Regents, etc. the "Arts" such as music education somehow "involuntarily" pull the "short straw" each time, and experience the heaviest hit to their finances.  The beliefs that many have about the importance of music education couldn't be further from the truth.  Ask any musician and he or she will tell you they learn a heck of a lot.  As a matter of fact, music is one of the few areas of study (if not the only area of study) where students learn history, mathematics, science, literature, foreign language, art, and it teaches cooperation/collaboration with others.  Music education even takes the student's thinking to a philosophical level with the polishing of students reasoning skills.  Name another educational program or department that innately incorporates multiple curricula.  It definitely appears music education actually increases the student's aptitude and capability of learning. 

In light of this, CJ 'Mr. BCE' Nelldell - Owner & Founder of the BCE clothing brand and the BCE team have begun sending the company on a nationwide thrust to support music education.  The company began with support efforts for the Human Jukebox band (the band of Mr. Nelldell's college alma mater Southern University) after state budget cuts significantly stifled their ability to travel with the football team during the 2010-11 football season.  It then dawned on Mr. Nelldell, "How many other music programs across the nation are suffering from strained finances?"  And the push began to reach out to grade school level band booster clubs to aid them in their fund raising efforts with fresh new ideas and a clothing brand that speaks the music world's language of EXCELLENCE.  A push that happens to be in line with BCE's philanthropic mission to strengthen communities and families through educational support. 

In closing, Mr. Nelldell mentions, "Being that the BCE clothing brand is just shy of its first birthday (which makes us a very small company), we're a small company with a big heart and the fight as vicious as a pack of lioness protecting their young.  We're going to need the support of the people that can relate to what's going on to back us in our efforts.  I discovered my life's purpose is to help people Achieve GREATNESS, so I literally made it my business.  I vow not to rest until I've helped as many people as possible do just that." 

BCE...a Fashion Line for the Bold, Confident, & Excellent
Identify Yourself with GREATNESS™
http://www.bceapparel.com/

Are You Really Getting Money?

Take a ride through any metropolitan city, turn on the television or radio and you see or hear about someone engaging in the hustle or the often talked about "paper chase".  Log on to Facebook, Twitter, etc. and what you can almost always bet on reading at least once in your news feed or timeline is the same exact thing.  The world is filled with hustlers, paper chasers, dreamers, and folks talking about "they're getting money".  People of the world are infatuated with "getting money" but I wonder if they ever stopped to think that money/wealth follows GREATNESS.  You can't be mediocre or average and boast about how much "money" you're getting.  Number one, your humility needs to be fine-tuned because people that are actually getting money have no need to boast and brag about it.  Number two, people that aren't GREAT or don't strive to be GREAT fail to acquire wealth and find themselves chasing it until life's final common denominator.  Achieving GREATNESS is a mentality.  Achieve GREATNESS, exercise humility, and money/wealth will follow in abundance. 

Are you GREAT at what you do?  Do you aspire to be someone GREAT?  If your answer to these questions is no, you can't say yes to them with confidence, or you don't know what it means to be GREAT...you're probably not "getting money".  If you don't believe me, think about it.  In sports, why are some players paid a lot more than others, but yet they play the same position?  Why are certain people remembered and talked about even after they have passed decades ago?  Why did Barack Obama win the presidency over John McCain?  Why are there so many people with literary talents, but only a few obtain the prize (Pulitzer that is)?  Why are certain entertainers more renowned than others?  Having trouble seeing the bigger picture?  Just go back and do a comparison of people who have achieved GREATNESS and are actually "getting money"; what you will find in your comparison is there are those who exude excellence and GREATNESS and there are those who don't.  This is something that can go on and on, but I believe you get the point. 

First work on being GREAT and the money/fame/wealth will follow, but remember it takes humility to keep it; nobody likes an asshole; because, not so GREAT people don't obtain these things.  How do you know when you have achieved GREATNESS?  GREATNESS is achieved at the point when you stop chasing money/wealth and it starts chasing you.  GREATNESS = Humilty + Respect + Money + Power.

Think GREAT * Dress GREAT * Be GREAT

BCE...a Fashion Line for the Bold, Confident, & Excellent
Identify Yourself with GREATNESS™
http://www.bceapparel.com/

Identify Yourself with GREATNESS™

Caring, Blessings, & Bliss

They say good things come to those who wait.  They also say good things happen to people who do good things for others.  I guess I got the chance to experience that this past weekend of September 18 - 19, 2010 because, there is no way these things could have been orchestrated.  This was one of the most blessed weekends ever shawty.  I got the opportunity to bless someone else's life and my life was blessed as well. 

It started when one of my homegirls from college flew into town on Thursday evening to spend the weekend with a guy she was talking to.  Saturday as I was getting my swagger together for a day party at the Glenn Hotel, I get a phone call from her asking me questions like..."if a woman came into town to spend the weekend with you, wouldn't you have the weekend planned for her?"  "Wouldn't you take her out to eat, show her around the city, etc.?"  "Would your ideal weekend with her be sitting in the house saying to her things like "you came to see me why do we need to go out?" or taking her to strip clubs?"  My immediate response to her was..."where did you meet this lame?" lol.  Subsequently I told her, "yes, I would have had everything planned."  At this point, my homegirl was ready to leave Atlanta (which was her very first visit to my city might I add).  So I told her look here, "I'll come get you and you can go to this party with me because I want you to have a good time while you're here."  She responds, "that won't be appropriate to ask you to come to this guys house."  I respond, "No...what's not appropriate is him not treating you like a woman.  Besides, tell him I'm your cousin...he doesn't know me."  So, I end up going to get her, taking her to the party where she had so much fun, took her to some of Atlanta's greatest attractions.  While on this tour, our last stop before going back to get something to eat was the Martin Luther King Jr. museum.  As we were walking back to my whip, there was a video being shot right across the street and the director of the video yelled, "yo do y'all want a cameo in this video we're shooting featuring Slick Pulla from Jeezy's label CTE?"  I yell back, "sure why not?!"  So, we were given our role in the video and knocked it out the park.  Everyone in the video noticed what I was wearing and asked me where did I get it from (I guess they liked it because they wanted to wear it in the video) and I was then invited to come out to day 2 of the shoot the next day and bring some ladies I know.  Skipping ahead, me and my homegirl went out to eat and then we went out to the club where we ended our fun at 4:30am.   

The very next day, I was able to get into contact with one of my other homegirls (who I have a strong adoration for) and found out she was just about to get on the road because she was moving out of town.  I was kind of devastated to hear the news because although she knew how I felt about her from the time we spent working together and hanging out, she didn't know how deep my adoration for her was; I'm a man that puts the ball in a woman's court, but I don't put myself ALL the way out there.  If she picks it up and dribbles, that's when I take her on the elevator ride of romance with me that doesn't have a down button.  So, she postponed her trip to be in the video with me.  We got the chance to spend a little time out together before going to the shoot (time I'd say I will definitely cherish).  We did the shoot, had fun, and the BCE brand was all over the place in it.  Its almost 10pm when she and I left the set so I could take her back to her point of departure.  We're laughing, talking, and listening to music (something we both love to do when we kick it because our musical taste is a lot similar).  We arrive at her departure point and give our normal hug to one another, kiss on the cheek, laugh a little bit more, and say bye; you know the normal awkward stuff lol.  I wanted to kiss her, but I always take the gentleman approach when it comes to women (in my opinion that always get you further with a woman; at least it has always gotten me further nevertheless lol).  On my way back to the crib, it hits me..."damn I can't let this girl leave like that shawty."  So I send her a text and here is how the convo went lol...

• Me - Damn!
• Her - What??
• Me - I wanted to kiss your lips and the feeling I get every time I see you; its like life starts all over again and I have an entire lifetime to know you
• Her - WOW! All I gotta say is you shoulda went for it. I wouldn't have mind it at all
• Me - Bussin a U right now
• Her - LOL. You are one of a kind
• Me - I never got the opportunity to hold you tight in my arms and let you feel my heart beat for you.  I can't let you leave without that
• Her - OMG CJ stop!
• Me - I honestly wish I could stop

So, as I bussed the U-turn, Bobby Valentino's - Knock Knock track from 2009 comes on.  It seemed like the perfect song for the scenario so I put it on repeat lol.  The only difference was there was no knocking involved.  I pulled up, parked, walked around to the front of my automobile, and leaned on the hood.  Someone tells her I'm outside and it was like something out of a movie because here comes this beautiful angel running towards me.  She grabs my face with both hands, thereafter our faces connect briefly and we exchange the biggest hug I had ever given anyone in a while.  I had to make the best out of my friend being disappointed, my vision for my company, and the departure of an admired angel.  All I can say is, I love God, I love my friends, and I love making the ladies smile ;-).  And to top it all off this was one of the best weekends for the BCE brand; GREATNESS really was achieved this weekend. 

BCE...a Fashion Line for the Bold, Confident, & Excellent
Identify Yourself with GREATNESS™
http://www.bceapparel.com/

Nobody Remembers a Quitter

Well, son, I'll tell you:
Life for me ain't been no crystal stair.
It's had tacks in it,
And splinters,
And boards torn up,
And places with no carpet on the floor—
Bare.
But all the time
I'se been a-climbin' on,
And reachin' landin's,
And turnin' corners,
And sometimes goin' in the dark
Where there ain't been no light.
So, boy, don't you turn back.
Don't you set down on the steps.
'Cause you finds it's kinder hard.
Don't you fall now—
For I'se still goin', honey,
I'se still climbin',
And life for me ain't been no crystal stair.
    - Langston Hughes

Destitute communities.  Homeless shelters.  The roof of an automobile sheltering us from the rain and sometimes attacks from mom's abusive boyfriend.  These types of events chronicled my childhood.  According to "society" which often stares down the bridge of its nose, those that come from a background or familial harships such as these are not equipped with the tools to impactfully contribute to American culture.  But still, I rise. 

You may write me down in history
With your bitter, twisted lies,
You may trod me in the very dirt
But still, like dust, I'll rise.

Does my sassiness upset you?
Why are you beset with gloom?
'Cause I walk like I've got oil wells
Pumping in my living room.

Just like moons and like suns,
With the certainty of tides,
Just like hopes springing high,
Still I'll rise.

Did you want to see me broken?
Bowed head and lowered eyes?
Shoulders falling down like teardrops.
Weakened by my soulful cries.

Does my haughtiness offend you?
Don't you take it awful hard
'Cause I laugh like I've got gold mines
Diggin' in my own back yard.

You may shoot me with your words,
You may cut me with your eyes,
You may kill me with your hatefulness,
But still, like air, I'll rise.

Does my sexiness upset you?
Does it come as a surprise
That I dance like I've got diamonds
At the meeting of my thighs?

Out of the huts of history's shame
I rise
Up from a past that's rooted in pain
I rise
I'm a black ocean, leaping and wide,
Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.
Leaving behind nights of terror and fear
I rise
Into a daybreak that's wondrously clear
I rise
Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,
I am the dream and the hope of the slave.
I rise
I rise
I rise.
       - Maya Angelou

You see, GREATNESS can be achieved by anyone.  GREATNESS is not racist.  It is not prejudiced.  It is not judgemental, and it does not deal in the act of showing favoritism.  GREATNESS is however, a mentality.  It is attainable.  It is humble.  It is giving.  GREATNESS is patient, it is kind.  GREATNESS does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  GREATNESS is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  GREATNESS does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  GREATNESS always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.  GREATNESS never fails.  Hence, GREATNESS is 1 Corinthians 13...LOVE.

As an adolescent boy, I made up my mind to never forget the aforementioned trials.  I chose not to forget them because this is my history; and if I forget where I come from, how will I ever know where I am headed?  Life has not always been GREAT, but GREATNESS has always lived within me.  It was those trials, hardships (or whatever adjective you choose), that awakened the resting DRUM MAJOR instinct that lived in me even before I was born.  Is it beneficial to anyone else for me to keep my history to myself?  NOT AT ALL.  You see, many people can relate to my story and I aim to uplift and inspire because, two things I do know is we all want to Achieve GREATNESS in some shape, form, or fashion, and roses do and will continue to...grow from concrete.

Did you hear about the rose that grew
from a crack in the concrete?
Proving nature's law is wrong it
learned to walk with out having feet.
Funny it seems, but by keeping it's dreams,
it learned to breathe fresh air.
Long live the rose that grew from concrete
when no one else ever cared.
     - Tupac Shakur

BCE...a Fashion Line for the Bold, Confident, & Excellent
Identify Yourself with GREATNESS™
http://www.bceapparel.com/

You are what You Think; You are what You Wear

For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he.  Proverbs 23:7 KJV

In following this scripture, I've lived my adolescent and adult life repeatedly saying to myself..."THINK GREAT AND YOU'LL BE GREAT.  This is the key to rising above the life I was born into."  A life of which much detail doesn't have to be divulged because most of you reading this can relate.  If not, perhaps you'll get my drift if I put it this way.  Like many, I was not born with a silver spoon in my mouth, but the human mind naturally causes us to thirst for and fight for more than what we had.  Despite this fact of my life which I had no control over, I knew I could and would ACHIEVE GREATNESS because I was born with an innate desire to be someone GREAT, and a mind that wouldn't allow me to think anything less than GREAT. 

Just like everything else in life, wanting to be GREAT also comes at a price.  A price that is paid through your actions, your diligence, your character, the way you walk, the way you talk, and all the way down to the way you dress.  Emphatically, I stress all of these things, but my profession causes me to expound upon the price that is paid for GREATNESS through how we dress.  We live in a world of choices, and I have the utmost respect for the choices people choose to make for themselves because, I am not in the business of criticism or being the judge of one's actions.  I hold a strong belief that what you wear speaks volumes about who you are or what you represent, and directly impacts your attitude and the performance of your daily tasks.  It is for this reason, the BCE brand of clothing was created.  Created because, being in fashion is about being me; I wanted to wear clothing that represents who I am, what I believe, and where I am headed in life.  I wear nothing that isn't representative of me.  For example, skulls and cross bones, which I've always associated with death or poison.  I am a leader, I believe I can and will ACHIEVE GREATNESS, and GREATNESS is where I am headed and where the remainder of my life will reside. 

"The drum major instinct is a desire to be out front, a desire to lead the parade, a desire to be first.  It is something that runs a whole gamut of life.  Before we condemn those that have these desires, let us see that we all have the drum major instinct.  We all want to be important, to surpass others, to achieve distinction, to lead the parade." ~Dr. Martin Luther King - Final Speech at Ebenezer Baptist Church - A Drum Major for Justice

THINK GREAT * DRESS GREAT * BE GREAT

**The YouTube video below of Dr. King's 'A Drum Major for Justice' speech is a magnification of the symbolism behind the drum major.

BCE...a Fashion Line for the Bold, Confident, & Excellent
Identify Yourself with GREATNESS™
http://www.bceapparel.com/